Life as a Mother-In-Law: Roles, Challenges, Solutions

The Mother-In-Law's Manual: Proven Strategies for Creating and Maintaining Healthy Relationships with Married Children

What's a Mother (In-Law) to Do?: 5 Essential Steps to Building a Loving Relationship with Your Son's New Wife

Daughter-In-Law's Survival Guide

Marriage dreams when fails !!!

DAUGHTER-IN-LAW a future MOTHER-IN-LAW

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The – “MOTHER and SON”

Most respected woman on the earth becomes the most-despising mother-in-law when son gets married. For every son on the earth, the mother is the most prestigious woman, her words are the most gifted, her blessings are the most rewarding, her hug is the heavenly touch, and her care is the most perceptive. Above all, she is a mother who assisted a son to come in this world.

The instinct as a mother emerges as soon as she is pregnant and the intention to deliver a healthy child becomes her dream. She does all her efforts to protect pregnancy so that perfect son is borne. The psychological change in behavior and intense involvement convince her to turn into excitedly pleasant. She “going to be a mother” becomes the purpose of her life. Her preparations begin right from the first stage of pregnancy indicates that how excited she is for meeting her son.

When born, is the happiest moment of her life. In addition, when called as a mother for the first time, she gains her real uniqueness. She takes the son straight to her breast to feed signifies that the mother is the one who is extremely and directly involved in his growth. Immediately after the birth of a child, her instinct drives to attach the child to her body and child’s instinct is to remain attached to mother for the safety and security. Her child is her soul and she would hate to detach from her because it is pleasant and contentment for both mother and the child. She is so much involved with the child that she feels fulfilled when the child is around. This is “The-Mother.”

She cares for him so much that he becomes a part of her life and missing a moment or a day is agonizing to her. Her care and love for him develop strong emotions and attachment. Her pain and involvement for his growth encourage him to go closer and closer, as he finds comfort and security. She is the best friend, her lap is the best place for him to soothe, her embrace is security, and her touch is relief. It is the mom everywhere and every time he needs. Therefore, intense affection with the mother encourages him to take steps favoring and pleasing her. He follows the directions of mom assuming she is always right, what she does is for his best, and it is true as all parents especially mother’s wish and dream is for the child’s glowing future.

Since the beginning mother saw him as her a child and in her mind, he is still a child is common feelings of mothers everywhere in the world. Mother’s dominant behavior and egoistic approach with the children is to protect and secure them.

  • To become a mother is woman’s ultimate objective.
  • Mother is more emotionally involved to her children than her husband.
  • The intense fulfillment and attachment together contribute to mother’s involvement for child’s growth.
  • Changes in body create a situation of desire to undertake responsibility for caring the child.
  • Look and physic of the child to adore is the natural gift to tempt others to adore. It is an attraction to influence others for own protection and security to survive and exist.
  • Mother’s warmth body is sense of contentment for a child. Therefore, child always desires to be held against the mother’s body.
  • She would wish to choose the best of the best gene to bear best child but it is sad for her, that the society restricts her to involve men to compete to associate with her.

The – “SON and HIS WIFE”

When reaching the puberty, he realizes that there is something else, which is also essential for his adult life. His necessity of carnal appetite initiates him to attract towards new woman. He dreams of a partner for his bed and life, is the time for a new woman to enter his life leads to the marriage or keeping a partner under new social system. The carnal attraction for him may be for his sexual appetite. However, for the nature, it is an enticement to human being to involve in sexual activity for creating future generation. His carnal fulfillment through a woman becomes his wife and his motivation and whom he respected the most through out the life is his mother. For him both wife and mother are equally important as he shares his feelings and wishes.

  • For a son his mother is auspicious connection and wife is loving partner.
  • For a son his mother is guidance and wife is a partner to share everything.
  • For a son mother’s presence is blessings and wife’s presence is satisfaction.
  • Mother is a source of his existence and wife is a source to create new generation.
  • His attraction to the mother is for her sacrifices during his growth and caring nature and his attraction to the wife is sensual and gratification. 

Woman who enters his life has her own feelings and individuality. For her, marriage is an emotional tie up to live together, share the feelings, and act independently for own house. For her the husband/partner is not the security alone he is rather a partner to play with the joy/sorrow, sweet/sour. Own home is the place for her to exhibit her personality, being a wife is her dignity. For a wife husband/partner is not only the sexual partner rather he is her security, support, and strength, and the closest companion with whom she can share her feelings. These feelings are the attractions, which contribute to emotions she possesses for the life after the marriage.  She carries the value of married life, which she desires fulfilled through her husband. Thus, her husband is her own belongings that she never likes others to share. She would hate any interference and if exists, she would fight back.  

        Wife enters new home is her submission to new environment so she expects the support in order to sustain.

        Her relation is direct with the husband and not with others. Smooth relation with others depends on the behavior and adjustments of both the parties.

        She expects similar environment as she had in parental house. She developed her behavior in the old parental environment are deep into her sub-conscious, cannot be changed as soon as she enters. To change the environment, new home needs pleasant attraction so can influence to adjust.

        She needs her husband and new home to understand her and her needs.

Above information is only my assumption and views may not be accurate or treated as solution, so please consult authorized persons only. Eligible students too are requested to seek guidance of teachers before referring above information.